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Wake Up Your Wisdom

by Emma Laurence

During challenging times, we often learn most about ourselves and our world.  If we anchor that learning, the wisdom gained lasts forever.

I started a journal last year called “perceptions on the edge of consciousness.”  I did so because I noticed some of the most important learning in my life was just barely registering in my conscious awareness.  If I could catch these subtle messages, these wisps of wisdom, and anchor them, I’d be integrating more of Life’s great teachings.

Concurrent with awakening and reeling in this inner wisdom came another realization. The most uplifting moments in my outer daily life could also pass by, barely noticed. 

As an example, my husband and I took a walk in our neighborhood this week.  We met a mom with her two young children on bikes with training wheels. We were drawn to them by their beautiful, rust-colored Cavapoo.  The dog was a magnet.  The family agreed that “Leo” was well loved.  Mom was shining with happiness, clearly relishing her parental role.

That evening, as I acknowledged the day’s gift moments, this meeting in the park landed at the top of the list.  Petting the beautiful dog and conversing with a loving family fed my heart.

My mind could easily have forgotten the brief encounter, or judged it as insignificant in the overall scheme of things.  Especially so if I had a list of tasks to accomplish that appeared to be the most important focus of the day.  It would be so easy to pass by. 

I track gift moments because they feed my spirit.  They show me how Life is coaching, guiding and supporting me.  They teach me that my path crosses with others not in a random and chaotic manner, but in a pattern that supports my service.  Maybe this occurs because I put service and love as my first priority (and I’ve learned to include caring for myself as service).  Or maybe, it’s happening to us all, if we awaken to the possibility.

We’ve all unearthed profound life lessons from difficult times. Wisdom is born of experience.  If we anchor that wisdom by consciously recognizing the moments that would otherwise be tossed aside, by bringing what’s just at the brink of our awareness into the human world, could we enter a state in which goodness becomes perpetually visible?  I’m beginning to see this possibility.

This is not a Pollyanna approach or rose-colored glasses denial.  This is waking up to inner wisdom and outer gifts amidst the full array of life experiences.  It’s a way to keep the heart open and the spirit in flight—two keys to serving all Life with greater ease.

[I’m offering a free Wake Up Your Wisdom group coaching class on Saturday, March 28th for those who’d like to share what they’re learning from this challenging time. Contact me at [email protected] for an invitation.]

Photo by Tim Foster on Unsplash

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How Social Distancing Can Bring Us Closer

by Emma Laurence

This week, as I ventured out for essential errands, I noticed a phenomenon caused by social distancing.  People may be staying six feet away, but they’re looking me in the eyes. 

Have you noticed this, too?

I often hear within this mutual recognition of a smile or nod, I’m OK.  You OK? Good.  We’re both good. Sometimes the look says, This is wild, right?

The recognition of one another as alive and well is a welcome shift.  There’s a feeling that we’re all in this together, and we’ll get through this, even though it may get more challenging before it gets easier.

My husband and I chatted with a woman from North Dakota as she helped us custom order a gluten-free pizza at the deli.  She reminisced of the days when kids were simply thrown out the back door to go play in the dirt.  Now when her grandkids visit, they say to her, We know, Nana.  Where’s the basket… where they leave all electronic devices at the door.  They run out back to play beanbag toss, or do art projects and baking indoors.  By the time the visit is over, they don’t want to go home. 

Let the kids eat some dirt and worms, she added.  Then they’ll be healthy.

We haven’t had a crisis like this in nearly twenty years—the kind that touches the whole world and changes daily life.  Long lasting changes will come from this, too.  Perhaps more of our freedoms will be taken away in name of safety, security and health.  Maybe more of us will get involved with democracy rather than assuming the government will take care of us.  Or we may awaken to the reality that we’re all connected and begin to take more responsibility for ourselves, more stewardship of other life forms on the planet.  We’ll see.

But we do have an unprecedented opportunity to trade in entitlement for gratitude.  What a shift that would be in our country if gratitude took hold. 

A pandemic can help us be grateful for the time we do have in the company of family and friends, grateful for the hugs in greeting that we used to take for granted, grateful for any occasion to gather in one place at one time.  Meanwhile, there’s an opportunity to see one another in the virtual landscape.  It’s not the same, vibrationally speaking—anyone who has Skyped with a spouse overseas or a grandchild across the country knows that—but it is being together in time. 

We will each experience this period of history in our own way.  We have choice in how we respond.  We can be an uplifting presence no matter the circumstances, draw our loved ones closer in our hearts, and give more charity to all.

(Illustration: Ari Saperstein for LAist)

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In 2020, “Row the Boat”

by Emma Laurence

It’s the fourth quarter of the Outback Bowl and, at a game-defining moment, thousands of Minnesota fans are chanting, “row the boat” while pulling imaginary oars.  I reach for my phone as my baffled husband asks, what does ‘row the boat’ mean in football?

We did not expect the answer we found. 

Minnesota Coach P.J. Fleck lost his infant son to a heart condition in 2011.  In interviews, Fleck shares how holding his second son while he died changed everything—what he believed in, what he’d done to that point, and how he chooses to live going forward.   Row the boat represents his son’s life continuing through his own; it became a mantra meaning never give up. 

For Fleck, this metaphor has three parts—the oar, the boat, and the compass.

The oar is the energy we bring to life in every endeavor.

The boat represents sacrifice.  Coach Fleck asks, “What are you willing to give up for something you haven’t had?”

The compass is the direction in which we’re travelling and our all-important travelling companions.

What a cool way to look at a new year and new decade:  energy, sacrifice, direction.

Energy.  It’s interesting to note how many of us began to shift towards plant-based food sources recently.  Food as fuel, one friend said.  To balance mental and emotional energies, many people have gone on media fasts or become careful about the images they ingest, especially before bedtime.  Still others are recommitting to spiritual exercises as a source of sustainable energy—the kind that supports long-term health, clarity and happiness. 

What kind of energy sustains us?

Sacrifice.  A millennial friend once shared that when he makes a request of Life, he first considers what he’s willing to give in order to receive the gift. I’ve thought in terms of the work I’m willing to invest to earn my way, but this notion of sacrifice stretches and inspires me further. 

What are we willing to give up for something we haven’t had before?

Direction.  Envisioning the highest goals engages our creativity and heart. Then, we can listen to Life as it coaches us beyond our imaginings.  Trusting this life force opens an opportunity to actually reach the goals we’ve set.

How coachable are we?  And have we invited loving traveling companions to accompany us? 

Pivotal to my own success has been connecting with my inner coach, the wise voice within, the inspiration for all things great and small, the voice of unconditional acceptance and perpetual learning.

Coach Fleck helped set the direction for his team, then credited the players themselves as the number one reason for the season’s success.  The Minnesota Gophers haven’t had an 11-win run since 1904. 

Monitoring our energy sources, contemplating true sacrifice, and setting our own direction through inner guidance can give us the best opportunity to “row the boat” all the way to our end zone.

Our winning season is within reach in 2020, too.

Photo by Joakim Honkasalo on Unsplash

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Do We Matter?

by Emma Laurence

Twice in the last week, I’ve encountered the term existential dread. 

One young woman described this state as “fretting over my non-existent influence on the world.”  As she struggled to make ends meet and balance her passion for activism, she found herself exhausted. 

When we feel overwhelmed, it’s easy to question our self-worth or impact.  We may find ourselves in the victim’s chair, wondering how we got there—again.   Or we fall under the wave rather than surfing its crest.

What’s important to remember is that our perception can shift in a heartbeat.  It can flip, just like a coin tossed into the air.

Two weeks ago, my husband and I were walking the loop around a nearby pond.  I’d been feeling pressured by the immense project of rebranding and launching a new website. 

The challenge of finding simple words to express the Life is Coaching You principle loomed large.  How could I explain something so experiential, so alive, so unique to each individual? 

To do so, I would have to be open to Life coaching me.  I checked in.  Was I listening?  Did I trust that the way would appear?  Would I follow through patiently on a task that felt like climbing an endless mountain with a full backpack?

In that moment, a white, curly-haired puppy on a leash rounds the curve up ahead. He’s excitedly sniffing the air and joyously jumping through fallen leaves. 

His owner walks slowly, watchful and smiling, letting the little guy fully experience the park’s sights and smells.  By the time they reach us, I can’t wait to meet this pup. 

As I always do, I ask the owner if that would be OK. 

“Absolutely,” comes the reply.  “He never understands when people don’t want to say hello.  Makes no sense to him.”

Four-month-old Biscuit leaps up to greet us, though his height at full stretch barely reaches our knees.  He licks our hands, and jumps back and forth between us. We can’t help but laugh and play with Biscuit.

There it is again, I realize.  The flip. 

Can you picture a dog fretting over his influence on the world?  Or worrying about how a website’s message could reach its audience? 

Not a chance.  Life is too fun, too full, too rich, too utterly enthralling!  A dead leaf on the ground is a cause for celebration.

After a time, my husband and I move on, and Biscuit continues his exploration.

Now comes the critical moment. 

Do I return to existential dread?  Or do I take the opportunity to release the old for the new, to step across the threshold into a state from which everything can be viewed with wonder?

Dozens of these choices—these open doorways—present themselves daily.  They may not all be as obvious as Biscuit, but they come. 

Puppies don’t care if they matter.  Because they just do.  And so do we.