The emotional challenges that we face at this time of year fill my heart with compassion. May these healing tips inspire a new viewpoint, breakthrough, or hopeful spirit as you address your own.
TIP #1: Clear away the FOG: Fear, Obligation and Guilt.
Ever since I first heard of FOG, I’ve been more aware when that cloud enters my consciousness. And I learn how to protect myself.
In Mary Carroll Moore’s book How to Master Change in Your Life, she cites an imaginative exercise called The Fear Room. Here’s a brief version:
Picture looking into a dark room with fog so dense that you can’t see. A truck arrives with workers who wheel a machine up to a hole in the outside wall, and they vacuum out the fog. Now, as you enter the clean, clear space, air and light bound, as well as a pleasing sound and fragrance. You can open five large window shades to flood the room with sunlight.
What remains when FOG is gone?
For me, visualization often works miracles in shifting to playfulness, clarity and right action.
TIP #2: Missing someone is integrating their memory.
I first came across this intriguing idea in The Presence Process by Michael Brown.
I observed what happened inside me when I missed someone, especially one who’d already passed on. There was a physical tugging in my chest with an accompanying painful grief. This could also be true with a person at a distance or a lost dream that never manifested.
I wondered, what would it be like to integrate a memory, person or dream into my heart fully? Could I accept the gift—allowing its essence to become such a part of me that we would never be separate again?
TIP #3: Become entirely ready to let go of the past
Years ago, someone approached me at a spiritual seminar, shook me gently by the shoulders and said, “You have got to learn to let go!”
Ya think? The comment felt supremely unhelpful because I already knew that about myself. What I didn’t know was how to let go.
Step 6 in any 12-step program addresses the concept of being entirely ready. After admitting the nature of your wrongs and before humbly asking for your shortcomings to be removed, you prepare yourself for the detachment process.
This intermediate step of becoming entirely ready for anything enlightened me. My question morphed into how do I prepare to let go?
When dealing with past trauma, I ask myself: What would it feel like to be entirely ready to release the past for this present moment?
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If you have other tips to share, please comment below. We can all benefit by learning from one another’s experiences, and I welcome your wisdom in this holiday season.
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash
Comments:
It helps me when I'm able to honestly say, "If this is my karma, I accept it."